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VIDEO: Susan Johnson on Restoring the Spark

Finding Your "Secure Base"

Susan Johnson

How can therapists help couples stuck in cycles of shame, hurt, and anger get back to a healthy, loving relationship? Couples therapist Susan Johnson uses the example of her clients Frank and Sylvie to explain how, by establishing what she refers to as "secure base," they restored both an emotional and physical spark to their relationship.

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“You Should Know What I Need”

A Simple Exercise to Help Couples Avoid the Assumption Trap

Alicia Muñoz

By Alicia Muñoz - Satisfying our needs is a gift our partners give us. Being responsible calls for a willingness to ask clearly and vulnerably for what we want, and to tolerate disappointment.

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The Wonder of an Unexpected Alliance

A Therapist's Surprise Connection with Her Client

Christina Emanuel

By Christina Emanuel - Ryan’s reputation arrived before he did: brilliant, oppositional, angry, a general pain in the butt, and autistic. Over the years, he certainly tried my patience and tested my commitment to him. But one day, a few years into his treatment, Ryan noticed a shift in me that helped me redefine what he's capable of, and what we're capable of together.

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The Myths About Male Sexuality

Esther Perel on Challenging the Definitional Void of Manhood

Esther Perel

By Esther Perel - At this moment in our society, we’re experiencing a reckoning in the relationships between men and women, in the relationships between gender and anatomy, and in the relationships between sex and power. As therapists, we have a unique role at this moment. We need to help create a culture where men can express their needs in more than just the masculine code.

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VIDEO: The Power of Predictability

The Cornerstone of a Strong Therapeutic Alliance

Martha Straus

Providing familiarity and predictability is one of our greatest tools in therapy, and can provide much-needed comfort to clients who aren't used to it. According to Martha Straus, an expert in working with kids and teens, young people need this familiarity the most, especially when they've survived trauma. Here, she explains how to model it in your work.

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December Quandary: Addressing Vicarious Trauma

Five Clinicians Weigh In

Chris Lyford

By Chris Lyford - A new client who survived a harrowing car crash is going through a deep depression. When she recounts her story, her therapist feels unusually affected, as if she’s reliving the event with her. She’s not sure how to deal with the vicarious trauma. Here, five therapists offer their advice.

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The Reassurance Trap

Living with Uncertainly

Martin Seif, Sally Winston

By Martin Seif and Sally Winston - We can’t guarantee certainty about anything, really. But some of us become haunted by needing to know for sure. We call this unrelenting need the Reassurance Trap. Here's a strategy for getting out of it.

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VIDEO: Rick Hanson on the Healing Power of Refuge

Focusing on the People, Places, and Activities that Give Us Sanctuary

Rick Hanson

A Networker Symposium highlight, Rick Hanson, psychologist and bestselling author, invoked the spirit of Mr. Rogers to help attendees better acknowledge their connection with each other and savor their most inspiring experiences.

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A New Year's Conundrum

A Stumped Therapist's Attempt to Help Two Parents Set Boundaries Has a Surprising Result

Ron Taffel

By Ron Taffel - At 15, Jenny regularly breaks her curfew, flirts with drugs, and is getting close to being suspended from her Manhattan public school. Today, she and her parents are in my office discussing the latest issue: New Year’s Eve is coming up, and Jenny and her posse have plans.

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The Cure Myth

We Need to Start Treating Anxiety and Depression as Chronic Conditions

Margaret Wehrenberg

By Margaret Wehrenberg - I’ve begun to put aside my idealized view that unless people overcome their difficulties once and for all, therapy is somehow a failure. Evidence continues to accumulate that many people who have anxiety and depression suffer bouts of it all their lives, even after a good response to therapy.

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