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The Perils of Empathy at Full Throttle
Four Strategies to Protect Yourself Against Vicarious Traumatization
By Babette Rothschild - It's our gift for empathy that draws us to our work. And yet, empathy at full throttle—felt and projected 100 percent with our bodies, hearts, and minds—has its risks.
After the Affair
Two Case Studies Illustrate the Opportunities Moving Forward
By Don-David Lusterman - My goal is not merely to help these couples weather the crisis and patch things up, but to help them understand how both spouses created the marital context that made an affair possible, and how the crisis itself can be the spring board to a healthier, more satisfying relationship.
VIDEO: Tara Brach on Facing Difficult Emotions
The Power of Deliberate Practice
Our survival brain has hundreds of strategies for resisting emotional pain. But according to Tara Brach, clinical psychologist and renowned teacher of Buddhism, resisting pain only increases our suffering.
The Unlived Lives of Parents
A Mindful Exercise for Healing Old Wounds
By Susan Pollak - Becoming a parent gives us a chance to grow by attending to old wounds, including many that we may have forgotten. The aim is not to deny our history, but to understand it and develop a new relationship with it, bringing self-compassion to ourselves in those moments when we lose it. Here's a seven-step process that can help.
VIDEO: Dan Siegel on the Difference Between the Mind and Brain
…And How Brain Science Can Help Us Create a Kinder World
According to neuropsychiatrist Dan Siegel, we've spent much of modern history thinking that physiological brain activity determines everything, and ignoring what goes on in the mind. In the following video clip from his Networker Symposium keynote, Siegel challenges us to help the mind rise above the brain's inborn, evolutionary vulnerabilities.
Finding the Path Back
Couples Therapy After an Affair
By Leo Fay - Every therapist knows that the disclosure of an extramarital affair can create an explosive crisis undermining the foundation of trust necessary to sustain a relationship. In the midst of that turbulence, our job is to help couples find a pathway to a new understanding of themselves and their marriage. Here's a protocol I've found especially helpful.
Getting Anxious on Purpose
This Approach Can Reduce Anxiety Symptoms in as Little as Three Weeks
By Reid Wilson - My clinical experience indicates that clients who can be persuaded to provoke and endure their symptoms without resorting to relaxation exercises quickly become habituated to their fears. Here's the five-step treatment I've developed, based on the work of the top clinicians and researchers in the anxiety field.
Something's Missing from Family Therapy
Twenty-Five Years Later, a Poignant Message from the Late Betty Carter Still Resonates
By Betty Carter - In order to understand the particularity of almost any couple's personal experience, we need to adjust our lens to include not only their private domestic encounters, but the much larger political and social struggle about the politics of relationships beyond the walls of home.
VIDEO: Learning to Let Go of Trauma
Bessel van der Kolk on the Power of Creating a Narrative
Imagine the helplessness of being unable to distinguish painful past experiences from present ones. According to Bessel van der Kolk, author of The Body Keeps the Score, this is what happens when a traumatic memory is triggered. Old emotional responses bubble up even when the current trigger has little to do with the original trauma.
