First Person

Creative personal essays on life and family
Article January 4, 2023

Far From Home

An Immigrant’s Search for Belonging
Sarah Jin

"Gohyang" is a Korean word that means "hometown" but translates to so much more. Read more

Article November 30, 2022

Love Scrabble

An Evening with My Wife's Boyfriend

Playing a traditional boardgame in a nontraditional romantic arrangement. Read more

Article November 29, 2022

The Couple Who Changed Me

Help Can Come from Unexpected Sources

The strongest couples are the ones who are open to help—the ones who can surround themselves with allies, inviting others into the trenches with them. Read more

Article October 26, 2022

A Script for Male Dementia Caregivers

Helping a Husband Be More Than a 'Pillar of Strength'

Many spousal dementia caregivers struggle emotionally watching their life partners slowly decline. But I also knew that male caregivers, especially spouses... Read more

Article October 10, 2022

Sweet Surrender

Ice Cream, Fatherhood, and the Meaning of Life

A tale about fatherhood and the pleasures of ice cream. Read more

Article September 14, 2022

Unhappy Campers

When a Guys’ Weekend Goes South

A nightmare camping trip exposes the limits—and possibilities—of male bonding. Read more

Article September 14, 2022

Laughing with Big Mama

How to Discover the Wise Guide Within You

A grandmother’s indelible spirit inspires a therapy practice. Read more

Article September 14, 2022

Colliding into 70

Don’t Send Me a Sympathy Card!

Getting old is hard. But sometimes, as the body becomes more vulnerable, the spirit becomes fiercer. Read more

Article September 14, 2022

"You're a Moron"

An Angry Client Embraces Therapy at 92

At 92, a pugnacious client discovers that it’s never too late to change. Read more

Article July 27, 2022

Wartime Trauma Treatment

Reflections from a Therapist Treating Ukrainian Survivors

A therapist specializing in trauma treatment in the wake of human-made and natural disasters shares what she's seeing in her work with survivors of the war in... Read more

Article July 27, 2022

Cutting the Cord

A Psychoanalytic Approach to Getting Unstuck

According to psychoanalysis, we all carry an imago—an image of our parents inside of us. But what do you do when the negative, traumatic, or unconscious... Read more

Article July 13, 2022

The weight of whether to put a child in a group home. Read more

Article July 13, 2022

A Therapist Confronts Cancer

Finding a Way through the Abyss

No one can prevent the horrors of cancer, but processing this particular experience of loss with a therapist who's been through it may stave off the trauma of... Read more

Article July 8, 2022

Attachment Grief

Living with the Loss of a Child

For someone who has survived the death of their child, describing grief as a journey perpetuates the myth that, eventually, there’s an end point. Read more

Article May 22, 2022

Whose Mom Is It Anyway?

Learning to Love My Mother’s Caregiver

A daughter’s resentment gives way to a lesson in unconditional love. Read more

Article March 22, 2022

The Diary Keeper

A Father Discovers What Matters Most

As time rushes forward, a diary promises the chance to slow things down. Read more

Article January 7, 2022

Four Simple Ingredients

Lessons on Baking with Matthew

Four simple ingredients will become bread, whether you do everything right or not. The result may not be perfect, but it doesn’t have to be. Read more

Article January 7, 2022

Life Without Atticus

When Siblings Parent Each Other

Children need an adult who provides safety, attunement, empathy, acceptance, and boundaries. Can a sibling be the next best thing? Read more

Article November 11, 2021

Moving in Synchrony

The Collective Tug of Family

Sometimes the road to connection involves a painful separation. Read more

Article November 11, 2021

The Love Magician

A Therapist Lays Down Her Wand

There’s magic in therapy—all types—the most astonishing of which only happens when you stop trying to put on a flawless show. Read more

Article November 11, 2021

The Therapists Who Raised Me

Tales from a Terrace Talk Veteran
David Lappin

When becoming a therapist feels like part of our genetic makeup. Read more

Article November 10, 2021

A Therapist's 40-Year Learning Curve

Maybe the Hard Way Is How We Learn Best

Over 40 years, a long-term client gives renowned trauma therapist Janina Fisher an opportunity to recover from clinical mistakes and apply new frameworks and... Read more

Article November 10, 2021

Through the One-Way Mirror

The Education of a Family Therapist

As a family therapy trainee in the 70s, it was easy to feel like part of a larger revolution. Read more

Article September 15, 2021

Hanging Out with Dick Van Dyke

A Lesson in Stepping Up

An encounter with a superstar teaches a young woman about courage. Read more

Article September 15, 2021

The Ambivalence Trap

Liberating Ourselves from the Pursuit of Perfection

A psychiatrist questions taking her own medicine. Read more

Article September 15, 2021

First, Make the Bed

A Gentle Path through Depression

In the throes of depression, a therapist searches for a magic bullet. Read more

Article September 15, 2021

Confessions of a Racing Mind

My Silent Battle with OCD

A clinician with OCD stands up to stigma. Read more

Article September 15, 2021

I know this experience will give me more knowledge to help others—that’s how I have to reframe it. As I’ve recovered, I’ve felt how strong and... Read more

Article September 15, 2021

When you do the work that we do, it’s important to find ways to take care of yourself. You can’t always carve out lots of time to devote to self-care, but... Read more

Article September 15, 2021

Talking About the Nightmare

When Our Work as Therapists Heals Us

For a firefighter turned couples counselor, healing means respecting deeply ingrained defenses while also exploring new ways of leaning on others. Read more

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