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VIDEO: The Science of Love

Learning to Think About It in a New Way

Barbara Fredrickson • 10/10/2018 • 1 Comment

According to Barbara Fredrickson, a leading scholar in the field of social psychology and affective science, we have a tendency to think about love in abstract terms. In this clip from her Networker Symposium keynote, she makes the case for broadening our perspective of what love means on both a physical and emotional level.

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The Resurgence of Patriarchy

Why We Need to Leave Neutrality Behind

Terry Real • 10/9/2018 • 4 Comments

By Terry Real - Factions of men and women these days are feeling a powerful pull toward many of the notions of traditional masculinity. What we’re witnessing is a reassertion of its most difficult and harmful traits. And yet we psychotherapists, as a field, have remained largely silent about this resurgence. Is neutrality in these times really in our clients’ best interests?

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The Courage to Let Go

A Special Story from Our Family Matters Department

Elizabeth Young • 10/4/2018 • No Comments

By Elizabeth Young - A whirlwind romance turns into a troubled relationship.

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In Your Client's Shoes

To Get a Depressed Client Unstuck, First Understand Their Thought Process

Michael Yapko • 10/3/2018 • No Comments

By Michael Yapko - Often when I work with depressed clients, I learn about the discriminations they didn’t make that have made matters worse. That typically leads to my asking a series of questions that begin with the word how. I’m not looking to interpret the meaning of people’s depression: I’m trying to understand the way my client is thinking that limits their perspective.

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The Three Marriages

Poet David Whyte on Our Work and Purpose

David Whyte • 9/21/2018 • 1 Comment

By David Whyte - Human beings are creatures of belonging, and our sense of belonging and not belonging is lived out by most people through three principal dynamics.

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The Core of Couples Therapy

Susan Johnson Explains the Root of Most Couples Conflict

Susan Johnson • 9/14/2018 • 1 Comment

By Susan Johnson - In couples therapy, the heart of the matter rarely concerns the content of a couple's arguments, but almost always concerns the strength and responsiveness of the attachment relationship they have. The bottom-line test of that relationship is in the answer to a fundamental question each is asking the other: Are you really there for me?

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When Doing Nothing is Everything

Especially with Kids, Learning to Slow Down Is a Precious Gift

Alicia Muñoz • 8/30/2018 • 1 Comment

Alicia Muñoz - When I got sick, something amazing happened: I let go of my agenda. Poof—just like that. In the process, I learned there’s nothing more important than doing nothing for extended periods of time, particularly with your child. It’s easy to overlook nondoing as an important activity—or as an important inactivity.

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One Enchanted Evening

A Special Storytelling Piece from Our Family Matters Department

Richard Holloway • 8/27/2018 • No Comments

By Richard Holloway - 40 years ago, to the shock of all my friends, I asked the most popular, desirable girl in school out on a date. When I arrived at her house, I noticed in her eyes a slight sadness that had never been evident to me before. Perhaps I should’ve had the presence of mind to ask her about it then.

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Helping People Pleasers Set Boundaries

…And What to Do When It Backfires

Alicia Muñoz • 8/18/2018 • No Comments

Alicia Muñoz - Boundaries bind. They limit, stop, and inhibit. But they also free people up to be themselves. In couples where one partner is a people-pleaser, things can get even more complicated.

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Making Partners Therapists for Each Other

In a Good Relationship, Your Problems Aren't Yours Alone

Ellen Wachtel • 8/10/2018 • No Comments

By Ellen Wachtel - In couples therapy, if we can help each partner be a better therapist for the other, all three of us can feel more helpful and effective. My favorite way is to start by using a particular exercise to provide a window into each partner’s psyche.

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