Letters from Home


Letters from Home

From Storytelling 2020

By Elliott Connie

May/June 2020


I’m a psychotherapy supernerd. I travel the world doing therapy trainings while writing books about my specialty, Solution-Focused Therapy, and posting online about the big and meaningful questions we wrestle with in this line of work. I love what I do with every fiber of my being. If someone invented a device that scanned the world for the biggest therapy fans, my enthusiasm for this work would instantly overload its circuits and explode it into pieces.

The kind of therapy I practice helps clients focus on what they’d like to be different in their lives through questions that imply they’ll get what they want—questions like, “What do you want to see instead of your problem?” “How will you know when your goal’s been reached?” And most famously, “Suppose overnight a miracle happened while you were sleeping. When you woke up, how would your life have improved?” This work requires faith on my part that clients not only can answer these questions, but welcome change into their lives.

It’s deeply ironic that I now get to believe in and witness clients’ changing, because I grew up having zero faith that things in my own life could ever change. I had a very difficult childhood. For 12 years straight, my father beat the shit out of me. He was an angry, dominating man, and there were periods when these beatings…

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1 Comment

Friday, May 8, 2020 9:28:41 AM | posted by Ned
Wow. Yes, I too have realized that while death is an inevitability, its antithesis and antidote for mediation is love. Trauma will make us believe that no amount of love can help; when in reality, only a little bit of love can move mountains and defy 'death' itself. What a powerful message... quite a tearjerker for me too. Thanks for sharing!