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What It Really Means to Apologize

...And Why Good Treatment Means Holding Wrongdoers Accountable

Harriet Lerner

By Harriet Lerner - There’s no greater challenge than listening to the anger and pain of someone who’s accusing us of causing it. To do so, people need to have a solid platform of self-worth to stand on, from which they can look out at their bad behavior and apologize because they see their mistakes as part of a much larger, complex picture of who they are as a human being.

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What Does a Son Owe a Mother?

A squeeze of the Hand

Barry Jacobs

By Barry Jacobs - For 58 years, from my birth until her death, my mother and I clashed over money and material values, cents and sensibilities. She may have felt entitled to a grand lifestyle, but I felt entitled to a less solipsistic mother—one who relished, not hated, my help. Years later, I found myself able to relax and just be her adult son in a way I’d never experienced.

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Expanding Your Therapeutic Presence with Self-Compassion

Moving Beyond Mindfulness by Embracing Our Suffering

Christopher Germer

With the rapid proliferation of new therapies for every possible difficulty in life, it often seems that we’re trying to do the impossible---eliminate basic human suffering. But suffering doesn’t seem to go away, no matter how many therapies or self-help strategies we employ. When we’re overwhelmed with intense and disturbing emotions, such as shame, just noticing what’s happening is often not enough. We need to embrace ourselves. Self-compassion allows us to do this. It means treating ourselves with the same kindness and understanding with which we’d want to treat someone we truly love.

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