VIDEO: Esther Perel on the New, Uncertain Landscape of Love
What Role Do Therapists Play?
Our relational lives are undergoing a radical shift, says Esther Perel, couples therapist, bestselling author, and TED speaker. In the following video clip from her 2018 Symposium Keynote, "The Future of Modern Love," Perel explains why today's romantic landscape—and the questions we're asking ourselves about desire and couplehood—are unprecedented, and what therapists have to offer clients who come to us for guidance.
Daily Blog
Copyright:
1/18/2018
Authors:
ESTHER PEREL, MA, LMFT
RICHARD SIMON, PH.D.
Product:
NRS001229
Copyright:
1/18/2018
Authors:
ESTHER PEREL, MA, LMFT
RICHARD SIMON, PH.D.
Product:
NRS001229
Helping Parents Rekindle the Erotic Spark
Why Does Parenthood Deliver Such a Fatal Blow to Intimacy?
By Esther Perel - The transition from two to three is one of the most profound challenges a couple will ever face. Family life flourishes in an atmosphere of comfort and consistency. Yet unpredictability, spontaneity, and risk are precisely where eroticism resides. Eros is a force that doesn't like to be constrained. When it settles into repetition, habit, or rules, it touches its death.
Daily Blog
Turns in the Road
Highlights from the Networker Journey
Out of all the hundreds and hundreds of articles that have appeared in the Networker over the past four decades, we’ve chosen a small sampling that captures the magazine’s most journalistic side, conveying not so much the eternal verities of our profession, but the sense of reading a first draft of the field’s history. Among other things, you’ll find therapeutic methods that, as exciting as they seemed at the moment, didn’t stand the test of time as well as initial forays into discussing complex issues we’re still struggling with today. We’ve also added in a few examples of writing so immediate and compelling that they have an air of timelessness. Prepare yourself for an interesting journey.
Magazine Article
Copyright:
11/14/2016
Author:
ESTHER PEREL, MA, LMFT
Product:
RNV051250
Copyright:
11/14/2016
Author:
ESTHER PEREL, MA, LMFT
Product:
RNV051250
The Mystery of Eroticism
It’s long been the conventional wisdom among couples therapists that if couples fix the emotional issues in their relationship, their sexual lives will improve. However, good intimacy doesn’t guarantee good sex. Couples today are confronting a new frontier in the basic understanding of what marriage is all about. Since most of us grew up in sexual silence, therapists need to ask more probing questions when it comes to doing good couples therapy.
Magazine Article
VIDEO: Are You Comfortable Talking about Sex with the Couples You See?
Esther Perel on How to Strengthen this Essential Capacity and Why It’s So Important
Many traditional approaches to couples therapy are built on the assumption that if you help a couple clear up the emotional issues in their relationship, sex will automatically get better. . . . But it doesn’t seem to work that way.
Daily Blog
Copyright:
10/29/2015
Authors:
SUSAN JOHNSON, ED.D.
ESTHER PEREL, MA, LMFT
HELEN FISHER, PH.D.
RICHARD SIMON, PH.D.
MICHELE WEINER-DAVIS, MSW
IAN KERNER, PHD, LMFT
SUZANNE IASENZA, PH.D.
Product:
NRS001170
Copyright:
10/29/2015
Authors:
SUSAN JOHNSON, ED.D.
ESTHER PEREL, MA, LMFT
HELEN FISHER, PH.D.
RICHARD SIMON, PH.D.
MICHELE WEINER-DAVIS, MSW
IAN KERNER, PHD, LMFT
SUZANNE IASENZA, PH.D.
Product:
NRS001170
Couples Therapy for Moving Past Affairs
Esther Perel on Redefining Marriage After an Affair
For several years, I've been contacting couples I've treated to find out more about the long-term impact of the infidelity that brought them to therapy. With those couples who've remained together in the intervening years, I offered a free, follow-up interview to discuss how they regard the infidelity retrospectively, and how they integrated the experience into the ongoing narrative of their relationship. Specificities notwithstanding, I identified three basic patterns in the way couples reorganize themselves after an infidelity---they never really get past the affair, they pull themselves up by the bootstraps and let it go, or they leave it far behind.
Daily Blog
Why Egalitarian America Needs Dominant Sex
Relationship Advice from Sex Therapist Esther Perel
America seems to be a goal-oriented society that prefers explicit meanings, candor, and "plain speech" to ambiguity and allusion. But ironically, some of America's best features, when carried too punctiliously into the bedroom, can result in very boring sex. I often suggest an alternative with my clients: "There's so much direct talk already in the everyday conversations couples have with each other," I tell them. "If you want to create more passion in your relationship, why don't you play a little more with the natural ambiguity of gesture and words, and the rich nuances inherent in communication."
Daily Blog
Copyright:
6/20/2018
Authors:
WILLIAM DOHERTY, PH.D.
RICHARD C. SCHWARTZ, PHD
ESTHER PEREL, MA, LMFT
MARY JO BARRETT, MSW
RICHARD SIMON, PH.D.
Product:
NRS001262
Copyright:
6/20/2018
Authors:
WILLIAM DOHERTY, PH.D.
RICHARD C. SCHWARTZ, PHD
ESTHER PEREL, MA, LMFT
MARY JO BARRETT, MSW
RICHARD SIMON, PH.D.
Product:
NRS001262
Copyright:
1/18/2018
Authors:
ESTHER PEREL, MA, LMFT
RICHARD SIMON, PH.D.
Product:
NRS001229
Copyright:
1/18/2018
Authors:
ESTHER PEREL, MA, LMFT
RICHARD SIMON, PH.D.
Product:
NRS001229
Copyright:
11/14/2016
Author:
ESTHER PEREL, MA, LMFT
Product:
RNV051250
Copyright:
11/14/2016
Author:
ESTHER PEREL, MA, LMFT
Product:
RNV051250
Copyright:
10/29/2015
Authors:
SUSAN JOHNSON, ED.D.
ESTHER PEREL, MA, LMFT
HELEN FISHER, PH.D.
RICHARD SIMON, PH.D.
MICHELE WEINER-DAVIS, MSW
IAN KERNER, PHD, LMFT
SUZANNE IASENZA, PH.D.
Product:
NRS001170
Copyright:
10/29/2015
Authors:
SUSAN JOHNSON, ED.D.
ESTHER PEREL, MA, LMFT
HELEN FISHER, PH.D.
RICHARD SIMON, PH.D.
MICHELE WEINER-DAVIS, MSW
IAN KERNER, PHD, LMFT
SUZANNE IASENZA, PH.D.
Product:
NRS001170
Navigating New Norms about Intimacy, Sexuality, Personal Freedom and the Purpose of Marriage
Copyright:
7/1/2015
Authors:
JOHN M. GOTTMAN, PH.D.
JULIE GOTTMAN, PH.D.
TERRENCE REAL, LICSW
WILLIAM DOHERTY, PH.D.
ESTHER PEREL, MA, LMFT
TAMMY NELSON, PH.D.
RICHARD SIMON, PH.D.
MICHELE WEINER-DAVIS, MSW
SUZANNE IASENZA, PH.D.
STEVEN L JOHNSON, JD
Product:
NRC095867
Copyright:
7/1/2015
Authors:
JOHN M. GOTTMAN, PH.D.
JULIE GOTTMAN, PH.D.
TERRENCE REAL, LICSW
WILLIAM DOHERTY, PH.D.
ESTHER PEREL, MA, LMFT
TAMMY NELSON, PH.D.
RICHARD SIMON, PH.D.
MICHELE WEINER-DAVIS, MSW
SUZANNE IASENZA, PH.D.
STEVEN L JOHNSON, JD
Product:
NRC095867
Copyright:
4/17/2015
Authors:
TERRENCE REAL, LICSW
ESTHER PEREL, MA, LMFT
Product:
RNV048415
Copyright:
4/17/2015
Authors:
TERRENCE REAL, LICSW
ESTHER PEREL, MA, LMFT
Product:
RNV048415
Copyright:
3/28/2015
Authors:
JOHN M. GOTTMAN, PH.D.
JULIE GOTTMAN, PH.D.
ESTHER PEREL, MA, LMFT
Product:
RVKIT049445
Copyright:
3/28/2015
Authors:
JOHN M. GOTTMAN, PH.D.
JULIE GOTTMAN, PH.D.
ESTHER PEREL, MA, LMFT
Product:
RVKIT049445
What Science Tells Us and Beyond with Julie Schwartz Gottman, Ph.D. and John Gottman, Ph.D.
Copyright:
3/28/2015
Authors:
JOHN M. GOTTMAN, PH.D.
JULIE GOTTMAN, PH.D.
ESTHER PEREL, MA, LMFT
Product:
RNV048565
Copyright:
3/28/2015
Authors:
JOHN M. GOTTMAN, PH.D.
JULIE GOTTMAN, PH.D.
ESTHER PEREL, MA, LMFT
Product:
RNV048565
Copyright:
3/26/2015
Authors:
JON KABAT-ZINN, PH.D.
JOHN M. GOTTMAN, PH.D.
JULIE GOTTMAN, PH.D.
DAVID GRAND, PH.D.
ESTHER PEREL, MA, LMFT
ELISHA GOLDSTEIN, PH.D.
Product:
RVKIT048985
Copyright:
3/26/2015
Authors:
JON KABAT-ZINN, PH.D.
JOHN M. GOTTMAN, PH.D.
JULIE GOTTMAN, PH.D.
DAVID GRAND, PH.D.
ESTHER PEREL, MA, LMFT
ELISHA GOLDSTEIN, PH.D.
Product:
RVKIT048985
Copyright:
3/22/2014
Authors:
DANIEL J SIEGEL, M.D.
JON KABAT-ZINN, PH.D.
BESSEL A VAN DER KOLK, M.D.
JOHN M. GOTTMAN, PH.D.
JULIE GOTTMAN, PH.D.
JANINA FISHER, PH.D.
STEPHEN PORGES, PH.D.
SUSAN JOHNSON, ED.D.
RICHARD C. SCHWARTZ, PHD
PETER A. LEVINE, PH.D.
DAVID GRAND, PH.D.
ESTHER PEREL, MA, LMFT
ELISHA GOLDSTEIN, PH.D.
DIANE ACKERMAN, PHD
DAVID FEINSTEIN, PH.D.
JAMES COAN, PHD
Product:
RVKIT051790
Copyright:
3/22/2014
Authors:
DANIEL J SIEGEL, M.D.
JON KABAT-ZINN, PH.D.
BESSEL A VAN DER KOLK, M.D.
JOHN M. GOTTMAN, PH.D.
JULIE GOTTMAN, PH.D.
JANINA FISHER, PH.D.
STEPHEN PORGES, PH.D.
SUSAN JOHNSON, ED.D.
RICHARD C. SCHWARTZ, PHD
PETER A. LEVINE, PH.D.
DAVID GRAND, PH.D.
ESTHER PEREL, MA, LMFT
ELISHA GOLDSTEIN, PH.D.
DIANE ACKERMAN, PHD
DAVID FEINSTEIN, PH.D.
JAMES COAN, PHD
Product:
RVKIT051790
When Three Threatens Two
Must Parenthood Bring Down the Curtain on Romance?
By Esther Perel - Sex makes babies. So it is ironic that the child, the embodiment of the couple's love, so often threatens the very romance that brought that child into being. But the brave and determined couple who maintains an erotic connection is, above all, the couple who values it. They know that it's not children who extinguish the flame of desire: it's adults who fail to keep the spark alive.
Daily Blog
Esther Perel's Guide to Creating Erotic Experiences
Good Intimacy Doesn't Always Mean Good Lovemaking
By Esther Perel - It’s long been the conventional wisdom among couples therapists that if couples fix the emotional issues in their relationship, their sexual lives will improve. But good intimacy doesn’t guarantee good sex.
Daily Blog
VIDEO: Esther Perel on the Legacy of Salvador Minuchin
From the Symposium's Celebration of a Family Therapy Visionary
A maverick and a visionary in the ’60s and ’70s, Salvador Minuchin put forth a brand new model of psychotherapy—family therapy. In the following video clip from the 2017 Symposium dinner event celebrating Minuchin's work, couples therapist Esther Perel shares her memories of working alongside Minuchin when she was just beginning work as a young therapist.
Daily Blog
VIDEO: Esther Perel on How to Talk with Men About Intimacy
Framing Intimacy as a Regular Part of Life
It's not always easy to get men to talk about intimacy and sex. But according to renowned sex therapist and author Esther Perel, there's a way to weave questions and observations about sexuality throughout your dialogue with reticent male clients that expands their understanding of its significance in all aspects of life.
Daily Blog
Esther Perel's Secret to Weathering an Affair
Two Ways Couples Who Bounced Back Made It Happen
By Esther Perel - For several years, I've been contacting couples I've treated to find out more about the long-term impact of the infidelity that brought them to therapy. What were the useful shock absorbers that sustained the couple? Did they think that therapy had helped? I identified three basic patterns in the way couples reorganize themselves after an infidelity.
Daily Blog
VIDEO: Esther Perel on the New Rules of Love and Commitment
How Boomers Shaped Millennial Romance
Couples therapist Esther Perel has been recognized as one of the world’s most original and insightful thinkers about couples, sexuality, and the peculiar paradoxes besetting modern marriage in the Western world. In this clip from her Networker Symposium keynote, she talks about the complicated and contradictory needs that are shaping Millennial marriage and commitment today.
Daily Blog
Esther Perel on the Paradox of Masculinity
What Does It Mean to Be a “Real” Man Today?
By Esther Perel - Feminism has given women a new narrative, but it hasn’t offered men a particularly new one that they can identify with. Ultimately, the lives of women will not change until the lives of men come along. What can therapists contribute to the current conversation about our gender politics and the meaning of masculinity and femininity today?
Daily Blog
The Myths About Male Sexuality
Esther Perel on Challenging the Definitional Void of Manhood
By Esther Perel - At this moment in our society, we’re experiencing a reckoning in the relationships between men and women, in the relationships between gender and anatomy, and in the relationships between sex and power. As therapists, we have a unique role at this moment. We need to help create a culture where men can express their needs in more than just the masculine code of sex.
Daily Blog
VIDEO: Esther Perel on the New, Uncertain Landscape of Love
What Role Do Therapists Play?
Our relational lives are undergoing a radical shift, says Esther Perel, couples therapist, bestselling author, and TED speaker. In the following video clip from her 2018 Symposium Keynote, "The Future of Modern Love," Perel explains why today's romantic landscape—and the questions we're asking ourselves about desire and couplehood—are unprecedented, and what therapists have to offer clients who come to us for guidance.
Daily Blog
Helping Parents Rekindle the Erotic Spark
Why Does Parenthood Deliver Such a Fatal Blow to Intimacy?
By Esther Perel - The transition from two to three is one of the most profound challenges a couple will ever face. Family life flourishes in an atmosphere of comfort and consistency. Yet unpredictability, spontaneity, and risk are precisely where eroticism resides. Eros is a force that doesn't like to be constrained. When it settles into repetition, habit, or rules, it touches its death.
Daily Blog
Our Myths about Sexuality
Highlights from Symposium 2018
Esther Perel called on the Symposium audience to challenge the various myths, especially those about male sexuality, that get in the way of deeper relational authenticity and more fulfilling ways of navigating modern relationships.
Magazine Article
Turns in the Road
Highlights from the Networker Journey
Out of all the hundreds and hundreds of articles that have appeared in the Networker over the past four decades, we’ve chosen a small sampling that captures the magazine’s most journalistic side, conveying not so much the eternal verities of our profession, but the sense of reading a first draft of the field’s history. Among other things, you’ll find therapeutic methods that, as exciting as they seemed at the moment, didn’t stand the test of time as well as initial forays into discussing complex issues we’re still struggling with today. We’ve also added in a few examples of writing so immediate and compelling that they have an air of timelessness. Prepare yourself for an interesting journey.
Magazine Article
The Mystery of Eroticism
It’s long been the conventional wisdom among couples therapists that if couples fix the emotional issues in their relationship, their sexual lives will improve. However, good intimacy doesn’t guarantee good sex. Couples today are confronting a new frontier in the basic understanding of what marriage is all about. Since most of us grew up in sexual silence, therapists need to ask more probing questions when it comes to doing good couples therapy.
Magazine Article
After the Storm
The Affair In Retrospect
As therapists, we have an unquenchable desire to find happy ending for troubled clients, especially those weathering the crisis of infidelity. But what happens months or years later to those couples once our work with has concluded.
Magazine Article
When Three Threatens Two
Must Parenthood Bring Down the Curtain on Romance?
It takes time—measured in years, not weeks,—for couples to find their bearings again after the birth of a child, and many never do.
Magazine Article
Erotic Intelligence
Reconciling Sensuality and Domesticity
Many therapists fail to recognize that sexual desire doesn't always play by the rules of good citizenship. By counseling political correctness in the bedroom, they miss the point of eroticism captured in Bunel's famous pronouncement that "sex without sin is like an egg without salt."
Magazine Article
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Esther Perel, MA, LMFT, is recognized as one of the most insightful and provocative voices on personal and professional relationships and the complex science behind human interaction. She is the best-selling author of Mating in Captivity: Unlocking Erotic Intelligence (translated into 25 languages) and producer of the online training continuation, Rekindling Desire.
Fluent in nine languages, the Belgian native is a practicing psychotherapist, celebrated speaker and organization consultant to Fortune 500 companies. The New York Times, in a cover story, named her the most important game changer on sexuality and relationships since Dr. Ruth.
Her critically acclaimed viral TED Talks (The secret to desire in a Long-term Relationship, February 2013 and Rethinking Infidelity .. a Talk for Anyone Who has ever Loved, May 2015) have collectively reached over 14 million viewers.
Known for her keen cross-cultural pulse, Esther shifts the paradigm of our approach to modern relationships. She is regularly sought around the world for her expertise in relational health and communication, team building, erotic intelligence, couples and family identity, work-life balance, and corporate relationships. Her clients and platforms include companies such as Nike, Johnson & Johnson, the Open Society Institute, Tony Robbins Productions, Brighthouse Consulting, Summit Series, Founder’s Forum, PopTech, Young Presidents Organization, Entrepreneur Organization, and the Bronfman Foundation.
Esther’s innovative models for building strong and lasting relationships have been widely featured in the media across 5 continents spanning The New York Times, The Washington Post, The Wall Street Journal, Forbes, Le Monde, Ha’Aretz and The Guardian, The New Yorker, Fast Company, and Vogue. She is a frequent guest on radio and television shows including NPR’s “Brian Lehrer show”, “Oprah”, “The Today Show”, “Dr. OZ” and “The Colbert Report”. For more information about her educational programs and resources, please visit: www.estherperel.com
Fluent in nine languages, the Belgian native is a practicing psychotherapist, celebrated speaker and organization consultant to Fortune 500 companies. The New York Times, in a cover story, named her the most important game changer on sexuality and relationships since Dr. Ruth.
Her critically acclaimed viral TED Talks (The secret to desire in a Long-term Relationship, February 2013 and Rethinking Infidelity .. a Talk for Anyone Who has ever Loved, May 2015) have collectively reached over 14 million viewers.
Known for her keen cross-cultural pulse, Esther shifts the paradigm of our approach to modern relationships. She is regularly sought around the world for her expertise in relational health and communication, team building, erotic intelligence, couples and family identity, work-life balance, and corporate relationships. Her clients and platforms include companies such as Nike, Johnson & Johnson, the Open Society Institute, Tony Robbins Productions, Brighthouse Consulting, Summit Series, Founder’s Forum, PopTech, Young Presidents Organization, Entrepreneur Organization, and the Bronfman Foundation.
Esther’s innovative models for building strong and lasting relationships have been widely featured in the media across 5 continents spanning The New York Times, The Washington Post, The Wall Street Journal, Forbes, Le Monde, Ha’Aretz and The Guardian, The New Yorker, Fast Company, and Vogue. She is a frequent guest on radio and television shows including NPR’s “Brian Lehrer show”, “Oprah”, “The Today Show”, “Dr. OZ” and “The Colbert Report”. For more information about her educational programs and resources, please visit: www.estherperel.com
