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By Rich Simon It seems astonishing that even just two or three decades ago, parents not only pretty much knew what was expected of them to turn their offspring into civilized adults, but they could actually count on society to back them up. Even more astounding, kids seemed to understand this, too. Even if they rebelled against, yelled about, or sullenly resented how “unfair” adults were, they seemed to acknowledge adult authority and realize that they would just have to wait until they turned 18 to get for themselves the keys to the kingdom of grown-up independence. | The Worry Hill - Page 8 |
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I then discussed with Maria's parents how they could RALLY (Recognize OCD episodes; Ally with their child; Lead their child to the RIDE; Let go so their child could RIDE on her own; and reward and praise—say Yes, you did it!) for their child. I also set realistic expectations for recovery. Given the urgency for relief, there's often palpable disappointment when parents hear that it may take three to six weeks before their child is appreciably better. Once they understand how treatment works, however, most families realize that recovery is a journey, not a single event. Parents need to know that each child is unique and progress can occur in fits and starts, ups and downs. In the next session, Maria was ready for the next ERP exercise on the hierarchy. We reviewed her previous ERP experience to prime her for the upcoming one. She then went to the next item on her Fear Ladder: describing the symptoms and causes of hepatitis to her parents. They were surprised at how calmly she could talk about hepatitis, which previously had been a taboo word. During the next four sessions, Maria slowly but surely tackled each ERP step on her Fear Ladder. The tasks got harder. Using only a limited amount of toilet paper in the bathroom, sitting on the chairs in my office after using the toilet, and hugging her parents after that were the hardest. Although she struggled at times, she was determined and always made it to the top of the Worry Hill and down again. |