Why Him? Why Her? - Him Her 9

 

So using another statistical sample, this time of 178,532 anonymous men and women on Chemistry.com, I launched my Word Type Study. I composed a list of 170 words and examined how often each personality type used these words as they described themselves and what they were looking for in a mate.

Adventure is the word most often used by Explorers. The other nine of their top ten most-used words (in descending order) are venture, spontaneity/spontaneous, energy, new, fun, traveling, outgoing, passion and active.

Family is the most-used word among Builders. Following this, Builders are particularly partial to the words honesty, caring, moral/morals, respect, loyal, trust, values, loving and trustworthy.

Intelligent and intelligence together top the list of words used by Directors. But they also favor intellectual, debate, geek, nerd/nerdy, ambition/ambitious, driven, politics, challenge/challenging and real.

Can you guess the favorite words of Negotiators? Passion and passionate. These men and women also prefer real, heart, kind/kindness, sensitive, read/reader, sweet, learning/learn, random and empathetic/empathy.

Words, words, words. As Mark Twain said, "The difference between the right word and the almost right word is the difference between lightning and the lightning bug." Words are verbal electricity. As members of Chemistry.com read the essays of potential partners, they apparently see specific words that instantly draw them to particular personality types.

 

Your Primary and Secondary Type

We are billboards of our genetic dispositions. And although each of us is a unique blend of all four personality types, we express some of these types more regularly (and more naturally) than others. I, for example, am predominantly an Explorer and secondarily a Negotiator. I have a few traits of the Director and even fewer traits of the Builder; and at times I can act "out of character."

But I have come to think that both your primary and secondary biological type are central to your temperament.

Patrick, Suzanne's new husband, certainly advertised his primary and secondary types: he is primarily a Negotiator and secondarily an Explorer. And Patrick showed many of the qualities of both these types minutes after he bounded into that Italian restaurant on his wedding night.

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