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MQ Nov/Dec 2011

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Who's Afraid of Couples Therapy

Streching Your Comfort Zone


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Facing Our Fears

Why we avoid doing couples therapy

By Ellyn Bader and Peter Pearson • As neuro-science increasingly shows how wired we are to our intimate partners, an important question arises for therapists: Why do we continue primarily to see people individually who are grappling with serious problems in their relationships?

 

 

Let’s stop wasting time—clients’ and our own

By David Schnarch • Conventional therapeutic wisdom aside, people typically don’t hurt each other because they’re out of touch, unable to communicate, or can’t help themselves. all too frequently, they do hurtful things with impunity and entitlement simply to gratify their own needs.

 

Deciding whether to be right or be married

By Terry Real • There’s an ancient saying that’s profoundly applicable to couples therapy: the laws of nature are like a miller’s wheel—they’ll grind you to powder, unless you learn to be the miller.

 

Treating the mixed-agenda couple

By William Doherty • Nothing can sink the heart of a couples therapist faster, no matter how battle-tested and savvy, than the mixed-agenda, half-in/half-out duo: spouse A wants desperately to save the marriage, while spouse B is already busy planning a postdivorce life.